Coffee Sayings (45)
Compiled & many originals by shirleyt@craftsayings.com
Collection © 1972 - Present by Shirley Thomas @ CraftSayings.com

For a Coffee Sayings Jar add a couple of packs of instant coffee in the jar with cut apart coffee saying strips.  Laminate label to jar and decorate lid.

1. Take time to smell the coffee.

2. With enough coffee, anything is possible.

3. Instant human. Just add coffee.

4. All the coffee in Columbia won't make me a morning person

5. If it weren't for coffee, I'd have absolutely no personality whatsoever!

6. Don't criticize my coffee. You may be old and weak one day.

7. My blood type is Folgers.

8. My blood type is Maxwell.

9. My blood type is coffee.

10. I love you a latte.

11. You are the cream in my coffee.

12. I drink coffee for your protection.

13. Is it coffee yet?

14. Some things in life are better rich. . . coffee, chocolate, men.

15. I'd stop drinking coffee, but I'm no quitter.

16. Wake up and smell the coffee.

17. Is there life before coffee?

18. There is no life before coffee.

19. There is life after coffee!

20. Is there life before coffee? There is NO life before coffee. There is life AFTER coffee!

21. Never stand between me and my coffee.

22. I found my perfect man: Mr. Coffee.

23. I won't be seen, 'til I get my caffeine.

24. I don't have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without caffeine!

25. No questions until I've had my second cup of coffee!

26. On the eighth day God created coffee.

27. Give me coffee and no one gets hurt.

28. Where's my computer server? I need some coffee.

29. My husband gives me lots of rings. . . coffee rings, soap rings, toilet rings. . .

30. Hangover Breakfast -- Tomato juice, black coffee, 2 raw eggs, aspirin, and our sympathy.

31. There has never been a better office communication system than the coffee break!

32. Mothers are those wonderful people who can get up in the morning before the smell of coffee.

33. The four food groups: Coffee, Ice Cream, Beer, Pizza

34. Retirement: World’s longest coffee break.

35. Retirement is one great big giant coffee break.

36. Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee and just as hard to sleep after.

37. If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. -- Abraham Lincoln

38. We've shared a coffee and a chat
    As friends so often do,
    So when you brew this single cup
    Imagine I am there with you!
    (Give with single serving coffee packet.)
    (Substitute "some tea" for "a coffee" & give with tea bag.)

39. Coffee has two virtues: it is wet and warm. -- Dutch Proverb

40. Moderately drunk, coffee removes vapours from the brain, occasioned by fumes of wine, or other strong liquors; eases pains in the head, prevents sour belchings, and provokes appetite. -- England's Happiness Improved (1699)

41. It is disgusting to note the increase in the quantity of coffee used by my subjects and the amount of money that goes out of the country in consequence. Everybody is using coffee. If possible this must be prevented. My people must drink beer. His Majesty was brought up on beer, and so were his officers. Many battles have been fought and won by soldiers nourished on beer; and the King does not believe that coffee-drinking soldiers can be depended upon to endure hardships or to beat his enemies in case of ... another war. -- Frederick the Great (1712-1786)

42. As soon as coffee is in your stomach, there is a general commotion. Ideas begin to move...similes arise, the paper is covered. Coffee is your ally and writing ceases to be a struggle. -- Honoré de Balzac (1799-1859)

43. Coffee should be black as night, hot as hell and strong as love. -- A saying from the American South

44. Coffee leads men to trifle away their time, scald their chops, and spend their money, all for a little base, black, thick, nasty, bitter, stinking nauseous puddle of water. -- The Women's Petition Against Coffee, 1674

45. Caffeine is my shepherd; I shall not doze.
    It maketh me to wake in green pastures:
    It leadeth me beyond the sleeping masses.
    It restoreth my buzz:
    It leadeth me in the paths of consciousness for its name's sake.
    Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of addiction,
    I will fear no Equal (tm):
    For thou art with me; thy cream and thy sugar they comfort me.
    Thou preparest a carafe before me in the presence of Thy Starbucks:
    Thou anointest my day with pep; my mug runneth over.
    Surely richness and taste shall follow me all the days of my life:
    And I will dwell in the House of Mocha forever.
    Amen